I plan to start a series of posts about my journey with God. It’s just something I want to do. Writing has an amazing way of putting things in perspective for me.
To begin, there have been times in my walk with God where there have been mistakes and stagnant muck. I held strongly to traditions, false doctrine and twisted scripture. Where in my ignorance, arrogance and hypocrisy I was not faithful, God in His mercy always is. I was not consumed. He continued to lead and work in my life even in the midst of all this. They say hind sight is 20/20. I have found that to be so true. Where I have chosen not to follow God’s path, He allowed me to venture outside of His covering and discover it is really not a good place to be.
There have been many times I have literally only stumbled forward in this walk. There really hasn’t been many leaps and bounds. There are times where it may appear that I made major changes in my relationship with God but that would be purely from outside perception. Going back to scripture and letting go of all the burdens of man, then making changes seemed to take years of steady progression as He brought both me and my family into faith and trust.
Whenever I discovered there was no fruit or negative fruit in a particular area of my life I was forced to ask….what am I missing? I knew I was covered by grace and had eternal salvation but why was life so often full of drama and hard here on earth? Was I to just “hang on” and live some sort of mediocre life until Christ returns or I die? Where is the joy and freedom in that?
It all came down to a matter of perspective for me. Do I have the faith to believe God means what He says? Do I really have that faith? Do I live my life according to my heart and understanding or do I search the scriptures to find out what blesses and protects the heart of my Creator and Savior?
One night 4 years ago I decided to jump with my eyes wide open….in faith. To believe God when He said. “If you love me keep my commandments” I let go of every heavy and oppressive doctrine of man within my belief system and chose to follow only what God says and study what Yeshua (Jesus) taught and lived. I moved from being a believer in Yeshua to a disciple. I was a person that came into the realization of what covenant means and devoted my life to mirroring Yeshua as much as I possibly could. Extreme you say? Maybe, but that is what disciples are called to. Worth it? Always.
The life of a disciple of Messiah is nothing less than amazing as I choose to grow according to His way and let go of my way of “what things mean to me”. My God is preparing His Kingdom. I am in covenant with Him by accepting His blood and life sacrifice as atonement for me and I know I am His. He is my Redeemer and Master. He calls the shots. He is the King I am His servant….not the other way around. I am no longer my own. There are some things I no longer get to choose. Saved by grace…. yes, obey by picking and choosing according to my own understanding and heart…no. I must always remember that. I am not called to walk according to the darkness of man’s doctrine or expectations. I am called to walk in the light as Yeshua walked. It’s as simple as that.
“God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Yeshua His Son, purifies us from all sin.” I John 1:5-7